When I started college, I had no idea that I would also be gaining a new, non-human significant other. My pockets were empty. My stomach was growling. I had nothing but a bottom-of-the-line microwave. Then it graced me with its presence: Its name was ramen. Ramen is the college kid food staple. Being the college kid I am, I quickly learned that a relationship with ramen follows the same patterns as a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship. From start to finish, ramen is right there in its own noodly ways.When freshmen move into their new dorms, they suspect nothing. They meet their new …

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Today, I made the regretful mistake of stepping back in time. Forgetting the two papers looming over my (un-styled) head, I walked aimlessly into Northrop Auditorium on a Saturday afternoon to be blinded by the glare of hot-pink feather boas bouncing to a techno re-mix of “I Know What Boys Like.” It took me a second to realize that under the heavy layers of neon fuzz were dancers. Dancers from the six-year-old very-competitive category, to be more specific. Here, on that same stage that so many bright women have crossed to receive their diplomas, were miniature prim donnas whoring themselves …

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Attending a summer music festivals is a tradition held by groups of families and friends nation wide. What is it about these events that prompts 100’s of thousands to empty their wallets and drive hours in the hot sun with little to no leg room? Is it to see an assembly of your favorite bands over the span of a couple short days? Is it the plethora of drugs and musical conversation shared? Maybe it’s just the trip in its entirety; the inevitable closeness with your fellow travelers annually achieved. In any case, they’re popular summer highlights and this summer …

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Sky Blue Sky

The kings of America’s alternative music scene are back. Often heralded as the state’s only answer to Radiohead, these six fellas from Chicago had grown increasingly loud and experimental on their last two studio albums. Both albums, Yankee Hotel Foxtrot and A Ghost Is Born, were met with the loudest of critical acclaim and fan adoration. Then with the 2005’s live release, Kicking Television, Wilco proved themselves an onstage juggernaut, popping eardrums and blowing indie minds nationwide. On Sky Blue Sky, the band is …

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Two CD releases and two Minneapolis shows that had the campus talking this spring were Nebraska-bred Bright Eyes, and England’s own Arctic Monkeys. Both shows left their attendees satisfied and energized, while both disks led to much appreciating and contemplating. Given the themes of these two albums, a spring release was perfect for college students and high school seniors around the globe. Each represent universally confronted questions which arise every spring. High School seniors must ask themselves, off to college or work at home? Current University students are forced to make a similar decision; will it be one last summer …

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On May 7th, the Arctic Monkeys sailed into First Avenue on a wave of hype and high expectations. They didn’t disappoint. The venue was swelling with British pride and swagger. The Monkey’s crew of roadies were some of the most overtly British creatures seen outside of a Guy Ritchie movie. They bantered amongst themselves, none too shy of vulgarities, or to the same obscure slang heard in Arctic Monkeys’ songs, recognizable only to born-and-raised Brits. The majority claimed large beer bellies from endless eves spent at the pub. The one skinny roadie earned the title of strangest with his long, …

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Just because you’re not good at something doesn’t mean you can’t do it anyway.The preceding sentence isn’t the slogan for the intramurals program run by the University Department of Recreational Sports, but perhaps it would be fitting. Just because you weren’t putting up 40 points per game on your high school basketball team or breaking historical rushing records on the football field your senior year doesn’t mean you can’t take part in such sports recreationally in college. By signing up for an intramural sport, you’ll be provided with a fully structured experience, including schedules, playing fields and referees. For these …

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I didn’t know what to expect. I hadn’t been to campus in about two weeks, at least not since classes had ended. Would it be a desolate wasteland? Would it be a sort of after-school yuppie wonderland? A hipster sidewalk sale? I had no way of knowing. The one thing I wasn’t expecting, though, was exactly what I saw. As I gazed down 14th avenue, it hit me: Dinkytown was breathing. After months of classes, stress, and drama, Friday afternoon felt like an exhalation; a body of nervous energy in repose. Despite its calm exterior, not all is well in …

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Freshman year is a time of confusion; a time when even the brightest of young America lose their way. These days, people tend to equate intelligence with street smLiterary. This is an incorrect assumption! Our more “seasoned” collegians know this to be an “all-to” common mistake. They remember the days fondly and laugh. Fortunately, it is at this tender age that one often turns a misdirection into an opportunity for exploration – taking in a spontaneous walk up a less-traveled street, dropping into a new café, or just sitting on a bench and watching the world go by.In this “freshman …

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Overworked, underappreciated and now under attack. In the past few months, European honeybees, responsible for pollinating many crucial crops as well as producing honey and wax have been rapidly disappearing, oftentimes vacating entire hives.Unbeknownst to most, many aspects of our day-to-day lives are dependent on the work of these bees. Anyone familiar with the food pyramid knows the importance of foodstuffs like fruits and vegetables, of which many require honeybees for pollination. European honeybees also pollinate countless varieties of flowers. AP Science Writer, Seth Borenstein additionally points out that cattle feed on alfalfa, a plant pollinated by honeybees. All of …

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Looking for some new avenues to take in your reading selection? Check out these titles at your local library or book store.

Fiction:

Scott Bradfield, The History of Luminous Motion
Paul Auster, City of Glass
Jose Saramago, The History of the Siege of Lisbon
Haruki Murakami, Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World
Italo Calvino, Invisible Cities

Non-Fiction

John R. Stilgoe, Outside Lies Magic: Regaining History and Awareness in Everyday Places
Carlos Castaneda, The Teaching of Don Juan: A Yaqui Way of Knowledge
Christopher Hitchens, God is not Great
Lenny Bruce, How to Talk Dirty and Influence People
Frank Rich, The Greatest Story Ever Sold: The Decline and Fall of …

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I’ve been smoked like a cig. I’ve been treated like a pig. I’ve been Newtoned like a fig, oh Lord. Oh, Lordy Lord, oh Lord, Lord, Lord, Lord, Lord.
Feels like I’m gonna snap like a twig.

I’ve been brought up way too high. And dragged down far too low. I guess that’s just the way things go. Oh, Lordy Lord, oh Lord, Lord, Lord, Lord, Lord.
But mere man shouldn’t try to disturb this river’s flow.

I’ve been dragged on through the mire. And tainted with false desire. I’ve been wrangled and tangled just like …

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I sit on the roof, outside my window
on the second floor of my house
smoking hookah and watching the Bunge
plunge into the sunset.The smoke ring sits gently with the parked
letters
of the spray can’s spark,
flutter me an antidote“A T T A K T H E G L O B E” Why not take the globe and push it a little
down a hill, maybe give it a kiss with a few toes
and a nimble hello with the passing stones.
Maybe we could wash it with sweet liquor
and watch as the little mountains grow sicker
and …

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It’s an everything!
And for that many people don’t reside well within it
for that many people reside well in certain tides
of mildew, others soft linen, and others the whip of the
arid cries of locusts to the stalk
the locust to the stalk
the locust to the stalk is not a certain anything
it is an everything
that’s what makes the stalk rot.What’s wrong with gutting the children for their mother’s milk?
What’s wrong with curdling the skin that doesn’t fit in
with the smoke stacks, or the mercury harbor, the uranium river,
what’s wrong with curdling the …

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“War is the health of the state”
- Randolph BourneRemember sitting in AP Government
Remember the New York Times
Remember the cover
of the
cover of the
cover of the New York Times
splayed with ideas
on 1% doctrines
where it’s ok when one feels the slightest bit threatenedto plow homes with sweet
depleted uranium?Unaccounted—does a child scream
when nothing is around to listen
except for the dust settling under
the once-terrace, now splayed heap
of arms and feet and vaporized concrete?Eugene Debs went to jail
under accusation
of obstructing the World War“The master class has
always
declared …

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