The Wake

ChatRoulette.com is the kind of website your parents warned you about when you first got dial-up in 1996: it’s chock-full of loose women, perverts, masturbation, pedophiles, and explicit language of the most vulgar and racist sort. It’s also got the ability to rope you in faster than you can say, “I’m failing out of college.” The concept is simple: it’s video chat with completely random strangers. If the person you get paired up with is insufficient in any way, no problem: just click the button that …

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I’m a white kid from Minnesota named Carlson, and it should be no surprise that I bleed purple. Unfortunately, Viking fans have shed mostly tears after yet another loss in an NFC championship game. It’s the Vikings’ own fault, though. This year it was turnovers, five of them. In 1998 Gary Anderson blew a chip shot field goal, which resulted in a loss to the Atlanta Falcons. But even though the Vikings continue to shoot themselves in the foot, the format of NFL overtime isn’t exactly …

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Everyone, sit down. We need to talk. This Avatar business is getting out of hand. It was fine when you just wanted to go for the 3D glasses and special effects. The effects were epic and it is pretty sweet when a big-ass dinosaur gets all up in your face. But when you started painting yourself blue everyday that was my first clue that something was wrong. You’ve ruined all the bath towels, not to mention the sheets. The only thing you’ll listen to is the …

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10 Albums that I loved:

Agoraphobic Nosebleed – Agorapocalypse

Who would’ve thought ANb would put out an album with an average song length of over two minutes? The world’s fastest grind band slows down a little, with mindblowing results. Absolutely fucking insane thrash trades off with insanely heavy riffs, with the best drum programming in human history. This record has the perfect grindcore mood: pissed off and wild and gross, offensive just for the sake of it, and ultimately lighthearted, playful, and carefree. But what matters most is that this band has finally become more about the music than the spectacle, …

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Bicycles and Coffee.

It’s the marriage of two ultra-hip products of our culture. And it’s arrived at the border of Standish and Ericsson neighborhoods in South Minneapolis.

So why should you give a damn about Angry Catfish Bicycles and Coffee? It isn’t because you’re looking for a new cup holder accessory to hold your coffee-filled thermos; it’s because you want quality.

Owner Josh Klauck cares both about quality of the coffee and bicycle-related paraphernalia served in his recently opened hybrid-store.

Currently, the coffee bar offer four kinds of …

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Although depression was classified as a disorder over 50 years ago, it existed long before the advent of modern classification methods. According to these scientific methods that now characterize the disease, nearly 121 million people worldwide are affected by depression. Many of these cases are left untreated. Unlike modern diseases such as cancer, obesity), depression’s origin has been contemplated since the time of philosophers Plato and Aristotle. Depression remains a prevalent and troublesome disorder despite the changes in social and environmental conditions over human history. Thus, it …

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There is poetry all around us—in the way we walk, the way trees shiver snow off their branches, and even the way we slip and fall on a patch of unforeseen ice—it is easy to overlook the rhythmic beauty of our world. But there is one place poetry is far from expected: in bacteria. And in this case, we’re not talking about metaphoric poetry.

Christian Bök, an experimental poet native to Canada, is intent on creating poetry that can withstand any natural nightmare—he is coding …

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Hypothetical situation: you are a rat. There is a bowl of cake frosting in front of you. Do you eat it? The answer is yes. You eat it all.

So you’ve eaten an entire bowl of cake frosting—why would you do such a thing? You weren’t that hungry. Now we’re at an impasse. The frosting is gone. It’s behind (or within) you now. Are you satisfied? Was it worth it? You have no answer for what you did, of course. You’re a rat.

Professionals are trying to find …

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