The Wake

On October 6, 1998, Matthew Shepard was severely beaten by two young men in a hate crime that shook Laramie, Wyoming, and attracted the attention of the nation. By the time Matthew succumbed to his injuries and died on October 12, 1998, news of Matthew’s beating and death made headlines around the world.

Since Matthew’s death his mother, Judy Shepard, travels the nation speaking about hate, intolerance, and a vision for a better future.

The number instances of hate and intolerance because of sexual orientation on the University of Minnesota campus was 10 times higher from spring 2003 to fall 2004, as reported to the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Programs Office on campus. B David Galt of the programs office attributes these figures to the controversy over legalizing gay marriage.

Judy Shepard came to the “U” on April 15 to speak about hate and intolerance on the ‘U’ campus, and every campus. The following is some of what she had to say.

Phone calls in the night

“It was 5 a.m. on Thursday, October 8 [1998], when the call came. Every time we get a call at such an hour it’s a silent prayer that, Please God, let Matt be alright. This time, he was not.

What kept going through my head was the image of Matt alone on the prairie for eighteen hours.

[At the hospital] we heard the machine helping him breathe, we saw the screen monitoring his signs, his face swollen. His right ear had been reattached. I was not sure this was even Matt. But when I approached the bed I saw it was my precious son. I could see the color of his blue eyes, but the twinkle of life was not there anymore.”

‘The Laramie Project’

“[The Laramie Project] is now one of the most performed plays today in high schools, which I think is brilliant. Can you imagine subject matter like ten years ago being in high schools? It’s got to be one of the best tools that teaches about gay and lesbian issues. Not about Matt or his family, but the community of Laramie and how it all happened.

Laramie exists everywhere. It exists in Minneapolis. It’s a microcosm of the whole world. Those people [portrayed in the play] are everywhere.”

On speaking out

“I’m not a professional speaker. I’m a mom—a mom with a story, with lessons to share. I would not have chosen [this career] in a million years. But as long as we remember what happened to our loved ones, they stay with us and they live on. This is part of my grieving process.

I do this because I don’t want this to happen ever again. Hate is a learned behavior. We are not born knowing how to hate. We learn how to love and hate in the media, newspaper, movies, and we learn it in our communities, in the backyard, on daddy’s knee, in church.

Hate has no purpose, no good. I think the purpose of our lives is to bring each other up, not to tear each other down.”

Matthew

“There aren’t enough words to describe how much I love and miss him. We shared so much; late night talks, a love of politics, movies, of books and good food and conversation. He was my son, my first-born. He was my friend, my confidante, my constant reminder of how good life can be and ultimately how hurtful. I will never understand why anyone would want to hurt Matt and to act with such complete disregard for another human being.

I could never have spoken again [publicly], but that would be unfair to Matt. This message is too important to stay quiet. I am his mom and I need to take care of him. Still.”

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