The Wake

They’re like, “Say your name, and your power animal, and what you like to do,” and when it gets around to me I say, “My name is Deniz. I am a powerful animal, and I enjoy making statements.”

Later, she decorates the woman with sliced strawberries and whipped cream and icings of many colors while she is being fucked on a table.

[please note that the woman's restriction of movement is entirely voluntary and consensual as she attests to (after the icing has been washed from her) while sitting on a couch with a towel covering the naughty bits of her body, her face red with either excitement or shame or slapping, which is another thing that she likes, I assure you]

I can never be sure if the reason why I think Ipecac Neat is far and away the best P.O.S. album is because it’s actually better than everything he put out after it, or if it’s because it was one of the first hip-hop albums I ever liked, because I listened to it over and over and over and over in high school memorizing every word. This is the problem with all criticism: your response to every record you hear is conditioned by your life’s experience of music, by what you’ve heard and when and how many times and how you felt about it, and also by what you haven’t heard. So throughout this review let’s keep in mind that I got into rap through Rhymesayers and enjoy it now primarily through anticon., and that …

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“You must never let them know that you care or they will kill you.”

Dawkins [with smart-sounding British accent]: “Hitchens.”
Harris [pointing at Hitchens' podium]: “Hitchens.”
Hitchens [passed out drunk on his podium]: gurgle, snore

“I wanna take a ride on your disco stick.”

Everyone wants to write a book. It’s a glorified prospect - you write a book, you must be bright. And in the digital age it couldn’t be simpler (to be bright). At this very moment, if I wanted, I could upload a text document containing any of my own writings, submit it to a self-publishing company such as iUniverse, LuLu Enterprises, CreateSpace or Xlibris and hold a hardcopy of it - sans editing - in a few days time.

The attraction to publish through one of these companies is clear: it’s cheap and quick (like couscous). Little to no upfront costs and one can have copies made for friends and relatives by Tuesday. The author has a great deal of control over the process with no need to worry about storage space for unsold copies; …

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I’ve been working on another piece and its been taking me a while to finish, so in the meantime I thought I’d just write about a certain something thats kept me entertained for the last few days…

While Republicans and Democrats duke it out in Washington, another headline worthy exchange has been taking place within the media itself. Last week The Daily Show ran a segment about the business news networks and their clueless economic correspondents’, CNBC’s in particular. The feud began when Economic Analyst Rick Santelli was criticized for his televised tantrum on the floor of the Chicago Mercantile Exchange where he denounced President Obama’s plan to assist home owners who were fucked over by their banks’ bad loans. Santelli was scheduled to appear on The Daily Show later that week but cancelled… or as …

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Chapter 1: All faith or dogma of any kind is fundamentally dangerous and an impediment to societal progress.

Chapter 2: Beliefs are assertions about the way the world is and therefore must shape the actions of their believers in drastic and potentially negative ways, and so they must be subject to evidence and, if necessary, modification in the light of that evidence.

Chapter 3: The positive things done by religious people throughout history are small exceptions in a long history overflowing with unimaginable brutality and violence.

Chapter 4: Holy fuck, Muslims are going to kill everybody unless we benevolent Westerners impose liberal dictatorships on them until they can get their heathen asses out of the 14th century.

Chapter 5: In the U.S. the infestation of religion at a government level results in the faith-based criminalization of things that are …

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[this post is part 4 of a 156-part series, "The Twilight Zone"]

This episode sucked and I don’t want to write anything about it.

After a typical café or restaurant meal, I am always stifled with a particular uncertainty – what is the appropriate tip? The level of my frustration depends on the venue – sitdowns are an obvious 15-20 percent, coffee shops take change jars, and fast foods are a no go. However, the elaborate bistros and tearooms are always ambiguous. After thinking it over, I have drafted a few personal standards that attempt to qualify tip worthy attendants.

For example, there are eateries in which a behind-the-counter employee takes your order, which is then custom prepared but requires you to go up to get it (Panera mode). This is a no-tip establishment, especially if I have to pick up after myself. There are similar places that have attendants refilling your drink mid-meal or taking away plates afterwards (like …

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Two Songs by Uncle Slam:

“Weirdo Man”

Psycho ward
Is your home
You’re so weird
You’re so dumb
Momma’s boy
Daddy’s disgrace
Snivelling wimp
Psycho face

You’re so week
You’re a geek
You’re a creep
Stupid freak

You got a psycho face
You are a psycho case
You got a real weird plan
You are the weirdo man

WEIRDO MAN

“The Ugly Dude”

He was conceived just like the rest of us
But when it came down to birth
He had a face like a butt
And his parents thew up
He went to school and the kids were so cruel
They all would torture and tease
And point and laugh at the freak
Kick the ass of the geek
And as he grew so did the hatred inside
The time for action was now
The next one laughing …

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Hey you fun-loving hipsters,

If you’ve ever wanted to go rant at Big Bobby B, he’s going to give you the chance. The University of Minnesota President, Robert Bruininks, is giving the annual State of the University address this Thursday, March 5, at 3 p.m. inside the Coffman Union Theater. Just do us a favor and don’t throw shoes at him if you’re angry about how expensive tuition is getting. After all, it’s not his fault the economy tanked.

So as you can see, I haven’t entered anything in a while due to some technical difficulty that reached its peak a couple of weeks ago. Like many of you, I am a mac user. I purchased my 13 inch Macbook after graduating high school and it wasn’t long till I started experiencing some problems. About 4 months into the school year my screen stopped working…. completely. Fortunately, i still had the benefits of the apple care support plan, so I reported the problem and had my laptop shipped back fully repaired and free of charge within a week.

So this is where it gets frustrating. I began noticing the rapid weakening of my battery life and after a while it wasn’t able to stay on for more than an hour or so. Strangely, as my …

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“How small everything has grown, and how terrible is the deterioration in myself!”