The Wake

As the United States and much of the world fretted over the elections in Palestine and Iran’s growing threat, Pakistani Prime Minister Shaukat Aziz visited the White House Jan. 17. Aziz used American airtime to say all the right things, pledging to fight both “terrorism in all its forms” and the proliferation of nuclear weapons. Meanwhile, President George W. Bush hailed the U.S.-Pakistani relationship as “strategic” and “a vital friendship for keeping the peace.”Vital, certainly—but this “anchor of regional peace and security,” as Aziz boasts of his country, remains far from a dependable ally in the war on terror.Granted, Pakistan is undergoing positive political and economic reforms, attempting to make peace with India, and has allegedly arrested or killed more than 700 al Qaida members. But in spite of Aziz’s claim to …

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A lot of people would love to save money and help the environment at the same time. Anyone who has ever considered going vegan, thought about buying a hybrid vehicle, or had to pay to recycle knows that thriftiness and earth-friendliness are not always compatible. Wouldn’t a little incentive be nice?Last year our government agreed on a set of rules regarding energy policy in the United States in an attempt to combat the growing energy crisis. Like many other components of the Energy Policy Act of 2005, this year the Hybrid Tax Credit has gone into effect. The small “Alternative Motor Vehicle Credit” section of this complex bill is dedicated to granting tax credit to people who buy hybrid cars in 2006. People and businesses that buy brand new motor vehicles that obtain at least …

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A light wisp of golden sunlight has broken the concentration of a lovely dream. She wakes slowly, yellow crust still in her eyes. With careful ease, she lowers her hand and rubs tight circles around her nipples. She fondles the silky, long brown hair on her breast and dives south to release an early morning onslaught. Dressed in only a fresh glow of orgasm, she rises and greets her mother with a quick genital fondle. She heads out, dry humps a palm tree and is ready to face the day: to take on the world, to fight for her rights as a female, as a highly intelligent being. Or, maybe she’ll just hang out and screw her neighbors. Yes. That does sound better.The bonobo is a primate of the same genus as the chimpanzee. …

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Before performing the song “Masters of War,” Bob Dylan once said, “I don’t mind the Ten Commandments, I believe in the Ten Commandments. The first one, ‘I am the Lord thy God,’ is a great commandment, if it isn’t said by the wrong people.” Decades after Dylan’s remarks, the wrong people still have the loudest voices when representing religion. Televangelist Pat Robertson is second only to President George W. Bush in using religion as an instrument to gain power. Just as Bush campaigned that “God wants me to be president” to the religious conservatives and evangelicals of America to sway the 2004 elections, Pat Robertson has used the same religious conservatives and evangelicals to acquire an important voice in America to spread his right-wing ideals.Robertson’s The 700 Club television program acts as a soapbox from …

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The world seems to eat multiculturalism up with a spoon. The University of Minnesota has the multicultural kickoff every year, McDonald’s has a website dedicated entirely to it’s Asian customers. All this fuss over everyone being included, Being a minority pretty much kicks ass. But this story is not about that, my friends. This is about my plight: the plight of someone only half multicultural. I am not white enough to join the yacht club, not Asian enough to be a manicurist. Neither negative stereotype works, and that’s a sad state of affairs. I am terrible at math, I did not enjoy the 11 years of piano I was paid to endure, I get mistaken for Jewish more than acknowledged for my Filipino and Chinese roots. Yet when applying to college, I mark “Asian/Pacific Islander.” …

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The Weather Channel lists the average high temperature of Minneapolis in December at 26 degrees. So why does anyone live here? Good question.Every winter people call attention to the many negative aspects of living in an arctic-esque climate. It’s a view that fits in nicely with overcast skies seasonal depression. But I am going to do a public service and try to cheer people up.Sure you may be paying exorbitant energy prices just to keep your place warm enough to keep your cheeks from freezing to the toilet seat, but look on the bright side. Think of every morning you go about your business as a little lottery. Except instead of truckloads of money, you may win the ability to urinate without incident.There are two simple remedies I recommend if you live in a …

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America’s youth are naively succumbing to manufactured images produced by America’s big corporations and organizations for profit. As a result, there are adolescents walking America’s streets with no clue as to what reality is. These males and females are mainstream culture consumers. They are caught in a coma of reality and are subsequently sustained by whatever image corporate America prescribes. Alone, this fact is not a great evil or threat to humanity. However, if one does not read the warning labels of particular images, then potential health risks to the whole of society can occur.As of now, America is the great melting pot for images of the 21st Century. Walk down any street in any major American city and you will see a representation of almost any group. This should not be confused with diversity, …

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It seems as though we are bombarded in the media with issues that could and does affect our health: the bird flu that may or may not reach the United States, whether or not a poor college student should splurge for organic products, and if one ever drinks milk safely. All these topics are important, but are they worth losing sleep over? To acid rain on your parade, the truth is we probably have not seen the full effects of these problems. Our generation will have to deal with the problems brought on by those of previous generations.While the bird flu’s impact is still to be determined, something we should be worried about right now are hormones in the water. This is because hormones are one of the only agents that cannot be filtered out …

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In the early 20th century, America was a country on the rise. Since the end of World War II, America has solidified itself as the dominant power in the world. The United States is second to no other country. As a result, America has prospered due to its global standing. Before President George W. Bush first took office in 2000, America was still the undisputed world power. Now it is apparent that the rest of the world is closing the power gap on America. Countries, such as China and India, are gaining ground on America due to their superior education, research and development industries and technological infrastructure. New York Times columnist Thomas Friedman writes, “As a nation, we [America] have a mounting education deficit, energy deficit, budget deficit, health care deficit and ambition deficit. …

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“Reporters should not be an arm of the law; if government employees illegally leak information, it is up to the government, with all of its coercive power, to discover the culprit, not a reporter whose primary duty is to inform the public.”-Judith Miller, of the New York Times, testifying before the Senate Judiciary Committee on October 19, 2005For nearly 200 years the press has been referred to as “the fourth estate,” an independent entity dedicated to acting as a watchdog over the three branches of government and informing the voting public. The need for a free and independent press was recognized explicitly by the framers of the Constitution when in the First Amendment they granted that, “Congress shall make no law…abridging the freedom of the press.”In 1972, the Supreme Court ruled in Branzburg v. …

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The dictionary definition of a “patriot” is “one who loves and zealously supports one’s own country.” I find it difficult defining the word “patriot” in my own words because I am a recently naturalized citizen of the United States. My father is ethnically Malay and was born in Sri Lanka. My mother is ethnically Portuguese and was also born in Sri Lanka. I was born in Dubai (a city in the United Arab Emirates, or UAE) but since one cannot be a citizen in the UAE solely by virtue of birth, I was granted Sri Lankan citizenship because my parents were both citizens of Sri Lanka. I was born in and raised as a Sri Lankan citizen and lived in the UAE for 17 years. Although I had visited, I feel as if I never …

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Web Editor’s Note: In this issue, the Wake began running one story per issue in another language. Readers of the print issue are directed to Wakenews.org to find the english translation. This issue’s alternate-language story is run in both Spanish and English below.Yo camino a clase día después de día y veo más y más las estudiantes que disfrutan su camina con un cigarillo en sus manos. A pesar de todas las advertencias y las precauciones para los adolescentes y los adultos jovénes sobre los efectos del fumar, en la Universidad de Minnesota, muchos estudiantes parecen relajarse en el camino largo con nicotina. Como estudiante de la Universidad, yo no soy ignorante del hecho de que fumar tiene los efectos de prejudiciales en el salud, pero yo no sabía de una …

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As of Oct. 21, 118 human cases of Avian (bird) flu and 61 related deaths have been reported worldwide. The cases have been concentrated in Asia where the bird flu has been developing since 1997, when the first known cases were contracted by humans in Hong Kong. The media, however, has just begun reporting the bird flu, portraying it as a recent occurrence. The fear cycling through world media outlets is that the flu will mutate and become transferable from human to human. For the past eight years, the virus has only been transmitted from bird to bird or from bird to human. According to recent reports, scientists and public health experts fear that the bird flu will be similar to the 1918 flu pandemic that killed 25 to 50 million people worldwide. Recently, the …

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You love them but sometimes they make you so irritated that you could literally scream: they are your roommates. October is typically the month when people get the first inkling that sometimes the people they live with (who are often close friends) are less than perfect. So, to make things a little easier, I offer a roommate etiquette guide to follow, in order to maintain better inter-housing relationships. Before we get started, “roommate” has a few different definitions. When students say “roommate,” we’re often talking about someone we share a house or apartment with, someone who helps pay part of the cable bill. For anyone who is living in a dorm, however, a roommate can be the person who takes up half of your 10-by-10 room. If you live in a dorm, work out a …

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U.S. Supreme Court justices are, in former Justice Robert H. Jackson’s words, “infallible only because we [the justices] are final.” Although Harriet Miers, the recent Bush nominated successor of Justice Sandra Day O’Connor, could prove to be fallible. Her resume is lacking any judicial experience. In 1972, Miers entered into private law with the Dallas firm of Locke, Liddell & Sapp. Since 1972, Miers has never made a single ruling as a judge because she has been a practicing lawyer for the past 39 years. In her years as an attorney, Miers has not once argued a case before the Supreme Court.Traditionally, a Supreme Court nominee has had judicial experience on either the federal or state level. Many have also come from the U.S. Court of Appeals. Although the Constitution does not explicitly state that …

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