An Exercise in Salt & Grease: The Wake samples Minneapolis French Fries



Art by Helen Teague

On a Wednesday evening, eight of our staff members dared to go where a bunch of hungry, drunk people have probably already gone before – we ate a big helping of fries at four restaurants across town in search of the very best. Two of these are local to campus (Annie’s Parlour and Five Guys), one is in Northeast (Anchor Fish & Chips), and one is in Uptown (Muddy Waters), all known for having good fries. Cut, texture, “mouth feel”, flavor, portion size, seasoning, and dips all went into our analysis of each bite.

Meet the team of fry samplers:

Kate Doyle, Creative Director

Abby Richardson, Managing Editor

Alex Van Abbema, Editor-in-Chief

Emma Klingler, Voices Editor

Erik Newland, Cities Editor

Carson Kaskel, Online Editor

Kellen Renstrom, Designer

Holly Wilson, Social Media Manager


Photo by Kellen Renstrom

Annie’s Parlour 313 14th Ave SE

KD (Kate Doyle): I feel like they’re very moist. Like, so moist.

AR (Abby Richardson): You’re really getting what you pay for here with serving size.

AV (Alex Van Abbema): Not very much flavor.

AR: These would taste really good dipped in a malt.

KD: They pair really well with sweet.

Only dip offered was ketchup. One half order: $3.95

Average rating: 7.125/10

Five Guys 1413 4th St SE


Photo by Kellen Renstrom

EK (Emma Klingler): Wow. A lot of seasoning.

EN (Erik Newland): I can like, chew the seasoning.

KD: Oh, it’s so spicy.

CK (Carson Kaskel): Very poignant and sharp.

AR: It’s like, sitting in the back of my throat.

KR (Kellen Renstrom): They have a really good texture.

KD: I would say too soft. There’s no satisfying crunch.

KR: My insides are Cajun now.

HW (Holly Wilson): These are drunk fries.

Only dip offered was ketchup. One regular order: $4.19

Average rating: 3.5/10

Anchor Fish & Chips 302 13th Ave NE


Photo by Kellen Renstrom

KD: It tastes buttery almost. They’re not the standard cut, either.

EN: I rate them a 9 for mouth feel.

HW: Imagine these with fish and tartar sauce.

CK: They kind of melt in your mouth.

HW: I feel like they use a yellow potato.

KR: A full-bodied fry.

AV: This was a truly magical experience.

No dips, but typically served with tartar sauce for .50 cents extra. One large side order: $5.25

Average rating: 9.75/10


Photo by Kellen Renstrom

Muddy Waters 2933 Lyndale Ave S

AR: They’re better with the dip, I think. It’s an aioli.

EN: That is a very crunchy, salty fry. Flaky, I’d say.

KD: Smoky.

KR: Delicious. I think the seasoning itself is the best seasoning of any fry.

EK: These are crispy on the outside and soft in the middle like Annie’s, but they mesh better.

CK: Very smooth chew.

HW: Good portion size.

EN: This is a different kind of fry. This is a fry that stands alone.

AV: I’m about to pass out.

Served with ketchup and herbed aioli. One side order: $4.50

Average rating: 8.625/10