Blair Witch-It-Was-Better

Why You’ll Be Snoring Before You’re Scared

Art by Rachel Lepinski

Art by Rachel Lepinski

Although our protagonists are equipped with sweet modern gadgets for recording the adventure, such as ear-wrapping Bluetooth cameras (those are a thing?), they only seem to have grown more lost.

The story is led by James, the brother of Heather from the first film, and his long-shot mission to find out what exactly happened to his sister. He is accompanied by Lisa, a documentary filmmaker, his close friend Peter, and his fiancée, Alyssa, as well as two guides from Blair Village. Unfortunately, the only reason these names are important is so you can track who is yelling at who in the big scary forest, a dilemma that comes to dominate most of the film’s dialogue.

Oh yeah, they have one of those quad copter drones, too!  Unfortunately, it crashes early on due to “poor service” coming from Lisa’s phone. Perhaps this could have been an opportunity for T-Mobile slip in a cheap and appropriate product placement. It would seem that the camcorder they used in 1994 was more serviceable.

What is sure to disappoint many of the original “Blair Witch Project” fans is the way the film is shot. Gone is the found footage feel, replaced instead by relatively neat cuts between a variety of different cameras employed by the characters. In some ways this is relieving, though at the price of a certain charm that made the series popular in the first place.

In the end, there are probably better ways to get scared this Halloween season than “Blair Witch”.