10 Ways Tiny Dorms Turn You Into a Superhero

Spending more than a semester in any of the University of Minnesota’s dorms is bound to make you go a little crazy. On the upside, superhero movies have taught us that it is in these times of trial that your super powers come out. So let’s see what you’ve got.

  1. Leaping down from your loft every morning has basically transformed you into Flying Squirrel Girl.
  2. Finding different positions for homework-ing has made you a yoga master. Step aside, mortals. Have you ever done a chabasana and chemistry at the same time? Didn’t think so.
  3. You have perfected walking through a trash-ridden room without stepping on anything. Indiana Jones would be proud of your agility.
  4. Your immune system is impenetrable—you haven’t vacuumed in 12 weeks.
  5. The super thin walls mean super stealthy sex: You could sneak past any super villain while climaxing.
  6. You’ve become a master rock climber trying to reach your dishes every day. And you look this intense while doing it.
  7. You transform into the Flash whenever your C.A. knocks on the door in the middle of circle of death.
  8. You’ve developed an ear piercing scream for whenever you walk in on your roommate getting it on. You should consider a career in opera, tbh.
  9. But after the initial shock, you’re chiller than Frozone. Dang, are they lucky to have you!
  10.  And finally, your mug brownies are to die for. Let’s be honest, this is your greatest power.