The Wake

So you’ve already seen the new Harry Potter movie and Chronicles of Narnia doesn’t come out for weeks. What’s that? No new Lord of the Rings DVD this Christmas? Well, you’re in luck, fantasy film fiend! Willow is just the ticket you need. Talk about high quality derivative fun! It’s true that Willow has overwhelming similarities to Lord of the Rings, but what it lacks in originality, this ‘80s classic more than makes up for in sheer energy and fun.

In typical fantasy fashion, an evil Queen rules over an unpronounceable land, but a prophecy foretells her downfall through a newborn princess. The Queen sets out to kill every newborn girl, but the princess is whisked down the river and rescued by a dwarven fellow,Willow. The local wizard sends Willow on a quest to return the baby to its own land, knowing there is something special about the child. Along the way, Willow is joined by two French-accented pixies, a sorceress trapped in the body of various animals and Madmartigan, the crudest, most charismatic swordsman to ever grace a medieval movie!

As I said, there’s nothing too original about the plot. There’s the destiny to be fulfilled and the knight who’s given up on society, the princess and little people (two sizes of them in Willow!). What makes Willow work is that it never slows down enough to let plot mechanics matter. There’s constant adventuring and each adventure jumps so quickly to the next it just seems like a constant flow, like an unending keg of nerdy beer! From barroom brawls to careening down a mountain on a shield turned sled, Willow is all over the map like a bad backseat driver. Only in a good way.

Similar to the plot, acting in Willow is hit-and-miss. The evil-doers in the film aren’t quite as sinister or over-the-top as could be expected, except for one guy who looks exactly like Skeletor. Thankfully the good guys receive plenty of personality. Warwick Davis is whiney but enjoyable in the titular role of Willow, as are the rest of his dwarven town. This movie belongs to Val Kilmer though. As the manic Madmartigan, Kilmer does the acting equivalent of the Iron Man competition, going from menacing prisoner to disgusting womanizer to poetry spouting ladies man in under a half hour. Val Kilmer rules! Except as Batman …

The special effects really look dated in parts, but an interesting special feature on the DVD points out this was the first film to use an effect called morphing. In one scene, a sorceress seamlessly transforms between multiple animals.

The two French pixies (why they’re French is beyond me) are not so convincing in their miniaturization or their purpose to the story. Luckily, there are also demon dogs and a giant two-headed dragon, each looking straight out of a ‘50s B movie. The dogs actually resemble the shrews from the classic Attack of the Killer Shrews. That alone should be reason enough to check Willow out!

But seriously folks, dated special effects are no match for oodles of ‘80s fantasy fun! If you missed this movie when it came out, either from being too young, too old or just too afraid of George Lucas (he wrote the story and produced the film) then you definitely need to heft on your full medieval garb, grab your full-sized replica broadsword and pop Willow into ye olde DVD player. Now nerd on, fantasy fan!