The Wake

Staring through the musty air at my favorite dive bar, tucked away at a small table in the darkest corner I saw a nicely-dressed man, sporting a pale blue button-down shirt, sitting next to a woman, hair coiffed carefully into a sloppy bun, wearing enough makeup to feign drag-queen status. They smiled a lot, chuckled awkwardly during conversation and frequently spent time silently staring into the distance both wearing expressions of horror and duress. A first date. They struggled for a while longer, maintaining conversation, looking as though they were choking back the urge to vomit, but still putting all of their energy into this date. I was mentally cheering them along, confident in the potential for success.

Then, he blew it.

I saw the slow prelude: his neck muscles tensed, his eyes began to squint and water, his face grew contorted in a gargoyle-esque fashion. He yawned. His mouth grew large, his arms involuntarily stretched, and with this slow-motion movement he destroyed the date. Her face fell. The polite giggles ceased, the conversation was no more. One uncomfortable hug later and they separated. He would remain the oil to her vinegar.

A single yawn can not only ruin a date, but anger a professor, halt speech, destroy a photo or trump the effects of vanilla-scented candles and completely kill the mood. More than this, yawns can aid lions in preparation for hunting, signal Parkinson’s or Multiple Sclerosis, or align one’s demeanor with that of his or her community.

Though most people do it every day, they remain entirely oblivious to the reasons for and implications of yawning. This article is my ode to the yawn.

First comes the slow opening of the mouth, followed by a deep inhalation typically lasting six to eight seconds, likely a stretching of the limbs and a quick snap of the jaw before exhalation. This series of actions, collectively know as a “yawn” has been seen in nearly every living creature.

In a study done of Siamese fighting fish, Dr. Ronald Baenninger, formerly of Temple University in Philadelphia, Pa., observed that immediately before and while fighting, the fish would take a small break, back away from each other and open their mouths in the same slow open, quick shut manner that mammals do when yawning.

Apparently, fish yawn.

Baenninger also observed yawning in countless species of mammal, amphibian, bird and the like.

During a yawn, a surge of blood is squished into the brain. The increased blood level causes a temporary jolt in alertness. The stretching of arms, legs, the back and neck that is often associated with yawning also serves as a means to promote blood circulation throughout the body.

It has long been rumored that people yawn because their bodies need more oxygen; that somehow we don’t breathe enough when we’re tired or bored.

Lesson one: When it comes to yawning, the general public doesn’t know squat.

Researchers have conducted experiments in which they placed people in rooms with elevated and decreased levels of oxygen in the air. The change in the amount of oxygen did not change the frequency of yawning.

However, there is truth in the rumors that yawning occurs more often when one sees another yawning or talks about yawning. This is an evolutionary habit created and maintained to aid species that live and work together in larger groups for the purpose of coordinating their activities. Yawning by one creature would serve as a sign to the others that activity is imminent and that they should yawn to ready themselves.

Dr. Ronald Baenninger is considered by many to be the foremost expert on yawning. He has spent over 30 years exploring this very normal phenomenon. Baenninger believes that people and other animals yawn to increase alertness in situations where relaxation is not possible or beneficial.

“Yawning is a way of regulating your level of arousal. So, if you’re in a place where nothing much is going on, but where it would be dangerous or embarrassing to fall asleep, then is where you’re going to yawn,” Baenninger said.

For example, when a lounging lion views prey and begins to prepare for the hunt, it will nearly always yawn. A dog getting ready for a walk will usually yawn and stretch in preparation for the outing.

Though there is no way to definitively prove this theory, no counterarguments have been offered.

Though Baenninger admits that he studied yawning primarily because he was curious and it was fun, there are more important reasons to study yawning. People who have multiple sclerosis almost never yawn. Those afflicted with Parkinson’s yawn more often than the general public. Changes in a person’s yawning habits could serve as a signifier for more serious problems.

In conclusion, I would like to cite a beautiful poem by Gareth Lancaster.

“Yawning”

When I yawn I feel so strange
With little prickles in my brain.
My eyes begin to slowly weep
It makes me really want to sleep.
And then my mouth opens large
Wide enough to fit a barge.
And once I’m done I feel refreshed
Unless at night when I need rest.

Nix Wurdak is a Voices columnist and welcomes your comments at .