By Tosin Faseemo, Megan Hoff, Olivia Hultgren, and Chris Shea
Since this is the Dad Issue, we talked to our dads about a few dad things, like how to cook steak, change a tire, and of course, their best jokes.
How do you make the perfect steak?
Tosin’s Dad: The key is to season it correctly before you grill it. The seasoning depends on the level of spice you want. If you really want, you could buy a ready-made spice blend to put on the steak.
Olivia’s Dad: I think you have to flip the meat many times. Also, don’t let it get too dried out.
Chris’ Dad: Seared in a cast iron pan (it’s the best surface to get even heat distribution and sear) and then finished in the oven. Restaurant style! This works for really any steak, but I like either a filet mignon or strip steak.
Megan’s Dad: You marinate it with Johnny’s Seasoning and Worcestershire sauce (or “woozy”). Then you cook it on the grill, and you watch until the top of the steak starts to sweat. Then you turn it, then you do it [the other side] half the time it takes to sweat. If you want the grill marks on there, you put it on the grill for 90 seconds, and then you turn the meat 90 degrees. Then you get those nice diamond grill marks.
How do you change a tire?
Tosin’s Dad: If it’s an emergency, there’s usually a spare tire in the back of the car. Instead of calling roadside assistance, I use a car jack to lift the car, then switch out the tire. After that, I’ll drive to the nearest auto shop because the spare tire is a temporary solution. If it’s not an emergency, I’ll go directly to the auto shop because it saves me time and energy.
Olivia’s Dad: You take your jack out of your trunk and you jack your car up and you take the lug nuts off the wheel and you take the wheel off and you put the other wheel on.
Chris’ Dad: I call somebody. I know there’s a sequence of things that happens like putting the car on a jack and then removing the lug nuts and then replacing the tire and then putting the lug nuts back on, but that’s a lot of work.
Megan’s Dad: Chock the wheels on the vehicle. Then you loosen the lug nuts. Then you jack up the vehicle, remove the lug nuts, remove the tire, and put the new tire on. Then put the lug nuts on. Snug ‘em up, and then you lower the jack. Then you torque the lug nuts.
If you had to choose between beer or sports to enjoy for the rest of your life, which one would you choose and why?
Tosin’s Dad: Sports, because it’s more enjoyable. Also, I don’t drink anyways.
Olivia’s Dad: Sports! Sports keep you both mentally and physically challenged because you have to control your emotions and really concentrate. Plus, they’re fun. That’s the main thing. I have more fun playing sports than drinking beer.
Chris’ Dad: Sports, because my teams are all in major markets (Boston), can spend cash and since 2000, they typically don’t have long stretches of suckitude. And drinking isn’t great for my diabetes.
Megan’s Dad: Sports. A lot of times I enjoy hearing the story behind the athletes and how they got to where they are.
What is one thing that you think you do better than your average dad?
Tosin’s Dad: Making personal sacrifice for my family. In terms of time, effort, resources, everything.
Olivia’s Dad: I can lift more weight than the average dad. I know better jokes. I don’t know, there are so many things I do better than the average dad, I can’t really think of one.
Chris’ Dad: Treat medical emergencies
Megan’s Dad: Oh brother. That’s a tough one. I’m good at getting lost better than any other dad. I’m good at not asking for directions, too. I could get lost in a paper bag. Telling jokes or stories. Also sharpening lawn mower blades.
What’s your best joke?
Tosin’s Dad: There’s a joke that I used a couple times when you were younger. It’s more of a sarcastic comment that Nigerian parents make when a child asks where to put something, and the answer is obvious. So once when your brother was seven, he asked where to put a roll of toilet paper, and I said “why don’t you put on my head?” and he actually attempted it. That was pretty funny.
Olivia’s Dad: What do you call two men with no arms and no legs hanging by the window? Curt and Rod.
Chris’ Dad: I’m more observational like Seinfeld, but… how does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
Megan’s Dad: The one-armed man fishing story. “It was that big.” Then you kind of put your one hand in the air and shake it.